"I TOOK HIM BACK TO WAL-MART"

I never could stand Melvin, Why I married him I'll never know. And for seventeen miserable years I have said Melvin has got to go!

I tried poisoning cakes, Stripping his brakes, salting his pork chops with lime. Wiring his chair, Igniting his hair even though playing with fire is a crime.

But, I failed at each plot, Till I suddenly thought of a way that would set me free!

I got rid of him for good, and, know what? They can't do a thing to me!

I took him back to Wal-Mart! They'll take anything back you know!

They said they couldn't recall selling him, But they must have if I said so.

They just credited him to my Visa, and said, "Ya'll come back now,'ya hear?"

They were so nice, polite, pleasant and insistent, I will, I'll take back his mother next year!

They'll take anything back at Wal-Mart, Though it's broken or rotten or sweet.

And know what else? This time of year? You don't even need a receipt!

~~Author Unknown~~

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